FAQ: How to set up a search to email new matches to you

It is great to be able to save a search of a particular set of matches you like. It is even better if you can be told of new members to that set by email… Well, you can!

Meetlane allows you to set up a search to email new match to you.

#1 Save a search

When you go to the browse page you will a row of white buttons at the top of the page. One of them is labelled as “Save As…”. Press this button and enter a name for your new search:

Create saved search

There, first step completed. Ha! And you thought it was difficult.

Tip: If you are unsure how to make a search that fits your needs to you look to this article which will describe it in depth for you.

#2 Go to the saved search

Click on the magnifying glass in the top bar. to the right, and you will see something like:

List saved searches

There! This is easy, right?

#3 Set up the email

Now, this part is slightly more difficult but still not too bad. Once you click on your saved search you will see:

Saved search page

Now, click on “Settings” and change “Email Me This Search Every” to either “Day” or “Week” and click “Save Changes”.

Pro Tip: for the advanced user there is one other setting on this page that effects your emails. Below where you just were you will see a field called “Email Me Users Who”. This field allows you to customise who shows on the email, either users you have not interacted with or only new users.

#4 Relax and let the matches come to you

All done! Not too hard and you get a lot of benefits for doing it. Now you can just see a new list of the perfect matches for you as per your schedule (if you chose something other than daily).

The Padawan becomes the master!

 

How to: Avoid online dating mistakes

Online dating mistakes can cost you a relationship so it is always important to get the basics out of the way and make sure you never fall victim to one.

Here are the top online dating mistakes which stop relationships from forming and people finding their special match.

Make sure you have the right profile picture

This is so important. You don’t want a profile picture that puts you in the “wrong light”. What is meant by that is not by how you look but by how you seem. So, for example: you should take an image of you dancing on the floor rather than stumbling in the morning lamp light drunk.

The profile picture will be the first and most viewed part of your profile and you should do it right. To not do it right would be the biggest mistake you can make in online dating.

A great article was written about taking the right profile picture.

Make sure you fill your profile in fully

This is probably the second biggest mistake: leaving an empty or only partially filled in profile.

An empty or partially filled in profile will give you a negative experience. Most people on here will not contact an empty or partially filled profile because it shows you are not serious about finding a date. This can end a relationship before it even begins.

Another awesome article was written about how to write the perfect profile.

Open a conversation the “right way”

Most mistakes happen when people go to talk. Normally they either say too little or get nervous and say something offensive.

An excellent guide on how to open conversations was written here. However, to sum it up: basically you want to say more than “hi, how are you?” but you also don’t want to write no more than, about, 100 words. On top of this, you would definitely want to write about their profile in the message. The biggest mistake you can avoid is to send a default “hi” type message. It will be ignored instantly.

Don’t go crazy or weird in chat

This is another big mistake. People think that when a person does not instantly reply they should send another message insulting them. As a side note, another excellent article was written on how you should deal with such situations.

You also shouldn’t seem strange by talking about marriage or dating in your first message. Instead you should come over in a friendly manner and move into making the relationship grow into something more.

Do not reply too soon

This goes not only for the previous point – whereby it was mentioned that you should be careful replying to no reply – but also in general.

Don’t be “all over” them. Give the other person space to breath and maybe even leave it a day before replying to let them have their own life while talking to you as well. If you smother the other person then they will most likely think you are a “weirdo” and eventually block you.

 

 

How to: Keep an online relationship alive

So, you have had your first contact. You have him/her hooked but… Where do you go from here? How do you keep the relationship alive long enough to meet that person?

Keeping the conversation alive

One important point is to keep the conversation alive. Keep it moving forward and to not let the relationship turn stale. The most difficult part is how to carry on the conversation after you have had your first reply and have opened up a channel to your potential partner.

In that spirit: here are some ideas that you can use in conversations:

  • Hobbies, ask deeper questions that trigger meaningful conversations
  • Where they live and areas around
  • Their favourite places to go abroad
  • Their job
  • Their family can be a good topic to bring up, normally something to connect with there
  • Their past, briefly (such as previous schools, life events)

Along with some of the basic topics above you can also talk about current affairs.

Talking about each other’s lives and even asking a “how are you?” or “what have you been up to?” can really trigger an in depth and personal conversation that can help drive a relationship and show the best sides of each other. After all that is the point of online dating, you want to find a “partner in crime”.

So, now we need to talk about more specific relationship handling. We have the basics down: how to keep conversation going; now we need to talk about specifics between short and long distance relationships.

Short distance

With short distance you can just talk until you are both happy to meet in real life. Ideally, you would like to know that person to a degree through chat. So, you need some ideas of how to move the chat along to the time you two meet. You can use the list above to help with that.

When you do eventually meet, make sure to read the guide on meeting someone in real life.

Long distance

If the relationship is long distance more work will be needed. You need to keep your presence with each other constantly so as to not allow loneliness to creep in on either side.

Have a video call once a week

Try to keep direct face to face talk at least once a week. This helps keep each other remembering what the other looks like and gives a face to the weekly talks you both have, essentially adding a human element.

Try to talk once a night

Just a “how are you?” is good enough. It doesn’t have to be a profound conversation every night, just a simple: “How was your day?”. This will let them know you care and have the effort to keep up with their life.

See each other within six months

This is also important, try and see each other within six months of meeting. If you cannot your relationship might not be one to pursue.

How to: Understand if you are right for each other

Understanding your match and whether or not you two are right for each other is the single most important aspect of relationship building. You could find that even though you two get on oh-so-well you are actually just friends. A deeper relationship does not evolve due to differences.

So, here at Meetlane a list of considerations for you have been compiled.

Check each other’s profile match score

The very first thing is to take quick a look at each other’s match score on their profile. It will show a number between 0% and 100% depending on how many attributes you match on. These attributes are “base” questions that are used to filter out obviously bad matches for the person you are viewing.

You should try having at least 50% match chance with them. Ideally, you should try for about 70%.

Relationship distance

The second thing, easily, is relationship distance. If it is a short distance relationship then things are a lot easier but if it is long distance then you will need to seriously consider the implications of such and whether or not you can make it work.

Many people will refuse a long distance relationship out right because they believe such relationships cannot be managed.

Are there any habits that conflict?

Do you smoke? Are they okay with that? Do you drink a lot? Are they okay with that as well?

There are a number of questions to ask when it comes to habits, some are not actually on the profile, such as snoring, and need to be asked in chat. Make sure you ask all habit questions. If your match is a snorer and you cannot sleep with snoring then the relationship will be a bust.

Try and direct conversation towards knowing their habits too, however, make sure you state yours equally; for example: “I know snore, do you?”.

What about marriage?

Marriage is an important topic but not always required. It can be negotiated and many wont care too much about getting married, especially if they have been married before. Many first time marriage partners will not negotiate though, so this is a topic to bring up with them and to ensure you match on.

And kids?

This is such an important topic, normally more important than marriage. Marriage can be negotiated to some extent but children… Eventually one side who disagrees will want someone who doesn’t.

Make sure this comes into consideration!

What do you both enjoy?

This is a very important one. You both need to at least enjoy some common events together else you will not have much in common. You should find at least 4 things you both have in common that you like doing. That way you can go out as a couple and enjoy the world.

In conclusion

The above is a simple list of considerations that would be needed whenever you decide if the two of you are right for each other. Following this article you cannot go far from wrong.

 

 

 

 

FAQ: Where should I take my date on our very first date?

This is always a difficult choice to make. Where do you take your partner on the first date?

The list below will help you in making the right choice. You need to consider multiple points when choosing a place for the both of you and it can be quite tricky.

Understand what the person likes

First, you will want to understand what they like. They might actually hate going to a cafe and love going to a carnival. You cannot be sure that going out to dinner or some “safe” event like it will always work.

Understand what you like…

This may sound stupid but you need a date where both of you will feel comfortable. It is not good going to somewhere the match likes but you do not feel comfortable because then the date will be a bust and, even though the other person would have had a good time, just not with you.

Find a common ground between the two of you, somewhere you both would like and feel comfortable getting to know each other.

Find somewhere public

Do not choose a “private” place to meet. Find somewhere public and in the open with multiple people around. Could even be a quiet place (not “jam packed”) but it needs to be public and have other people there.

Choose the right time

This may sound strange but you should choose the right time of day for your activity. You may find that, actually, your activity would be more romantic and fun at night rather than in the day.

Choose the right day

Again, just like the last point, strange but true. You need to choose the right day, especially if you are going on a date with someone who has previous commitments to other people (such as children).

In conclusion

There isn’t much more to be said on the topic of deciding where to go. It mostly boils down to some safety measures and what the potential date would like to do. What the date likes to do is very important.

Whatever you do on your first date make sure you follow Meetlane’s guide on how to meet in real life. That article will help you stay safe and be in control of your date at all times.

How to: Date safely online

Online dating has been linked many times to safety concerns, not only on other website but also in the news. So, this article comes to save the day by answering some of the questions about how to date safely online.

So, you might be asking: “How can I stay safe on here?”

It is actually, in reality, very simple if you follow these steps.

Do not hand out personal information

Not even an email address. Any kind of personal information can be used against you.

Do not give money

Do not give any money over, no matter how well put together a request is. Report this behaviour immediately.

Demand a video call

Exactly that, demand a video call with your potential match if you like them. They should easily be able to provide one to prove that their profile picture at least matches the person you are talking to.

If they do not provide a video call: report and block.

Do a Google Search

See if you can find a trace of this person on Google. If not then it might be wise to ask them why.

Keep as much of the conversation on Meetlane as possible

If the bulk of the conversation remains on Meetlane then scammers can be dealt with but taking it all off means they cannot since other applications cannot be trusted in reports.

Report any users who are acting weird or abusive

Unsure? Or Sure? It doesn’t matter, if you suspect in any way what-so-ever report it for Meetlane to look at.

It’s simple, really…

It’s simple and if you follow these steps your time on Meetlane will be an enjoyable one. Remember, report abusive behaviour too, not just scammers.

How to: Meet a date in real life

Meeting a date in real life is always tricky, it is difficult to know what you are getting. 99.99% of the time you are getting exactly what you fell in love with but sometimes that potential date might be different (even in a subtle way, like personality) in real life than over the internet.

Before meeting any date you should check out the article about safe online dating and make sure you follow advice there before considering to meet someone in real life.

Using this simple list of points you can easily meet someone in real life.

Meet in a public place with people around

Make sure you meet this potential date some where public and with people around, preferably a restaurant or cafe, also try to make it near town center and not close to home.

Tell them you will meet them outside

If you do that then you can leave if something is wrong without them knowing you were there at all.

Do not follow them to another place

If they ask you to then end the date

Tell some people about your intentions

Exactly that, tell someone; don’t just go running off to a date without telling a friend or a loved one of your intentions.

Keep in regular contact

Whether it is by text or by as phone call once every half an hour or so, it is always good to keep in regular contact with a loved one or friend.

Create a schedule to see a friend or a loved one straight after

This is very important, make a schedule with a friend or a loved one to see them at a specific time in a specific place after the date. This way someone is expecting you and will get in touch with you if you are not there.

In conclusion

Meeting someone in real life is a bit scary but with these simple tips you can be sure that you will be in control of meeting a potential date and that precautions are taken to ensure your safety and security.

FAQ: Will he/she reply to my message?

Whether or not a person will reply to a message you send depends on many factors, from picture to profile details and habits.

The Message

The message! Of course! It is the most important part of deciding if a person will reply to you or not! An article about how to start the conversation right can help you, but ultimately it is up to you to ensure you read their profile and produce a message that is unique and appeals to them.

This can get frustrating to do when no one replies to your well written messages but: keep going, you will get a reply sooner or later.

Profile picture

The very first thing a person looks at is your profile picture. This can stop them from messaging without even looking at your profile. If your profile picture is dark or bad quality, or even just an angle that does not show enough of your features it has been shown that another person would be much less willing to reply to you. It is important you take the right profile picture and you display it. Sometimes having more than one is a good idea.

Profile information

After your profile picture a match will always look at your profile before replying. It is where any potential match or, even, date will go to check if you two are compatible initially.

It is always best to have a match score above 50% when messaging someone, anything lower and you stand a much higher chance of someone not replying.

There are also “stopping points”. These are parts of your profile that do not match their own which they would use to class you as unsuitable. Normally, it is habits that come under this category, as such…

Habits

This is a part “profile information”. You may find not everyone likes a smoker, or a drink, or someone who displays the same traits as you. Even if the person you are messaging is a match in every other way they may not like some of your habits.

Normally such dislikes will be marked on their profile and you will be told, on their profile, that you may not match in these areas. If a profile does not make this clear and they turn you down for those habits then it would be best to report that profile to Meetlane; why? Because they are not dating truthfully.

But… At the end of the day

However, at the end of the day you could do everything right and have the highest chances of all but they still do not reply because something tells them you’re not the one. Do not threat, feel disparaged, or get upset, just pick yourself up and continue messaging until you find someone who replies back. This article will always help you have the best possible chance of getting replies.

FAQ: He/She did not reply to my first message, should I message again?

So, you have already sent a message? He/She has not replied? Well, there are a couple of ways to decide if you should send another message, questions to ask yourself.

Did  you send a message that could be classed as “bad” or “spam”?

Writing the “right” message is key. Did you say something that could be classed as offensive? Did you write a default a “hello” message? Did you go too deep in the first message?

If you did write something that might be considered “bad” you could remedy it with saying that you are sorry if your message caused alarm. It would be a bad idea to message anything else.

If you wrote something “good” then you should be in good standing to write another message.

Has he/she read your message?

If your message has gone unread then maybe you might want to leave it some more time before poking for a reply. If your message has been read then he/she may have forgotten to reply, or they are not interested, either way: you may need to know.

Even if they have not read your message if it has been a certain length of time it might be worth poking, it might be that they forgot to see your message due to being busy at the time.

He he/she deleted your message?

If they have then leave, do not message again; simple.

Has there been a decent amount of time?

This is the most important one, and one which goes unheeded in most cases. Time is the key to sending another message. You need to make sure that it has been a respectable amount of time. Normally a good amount of time would be one to two weeks.

In conclusion

If you clear these questions then you may find it productive to just give a gentle nudge to see if the other person will reply to you. Be careful! If you nudge impolitely or too many times that other person will block you.

FAQ: He/She has stopped talking to me, should I continue trying to talk to them?

So, you have been talking with someone for a while and they suddenly stop talking to you. What do you do? Should you message more or leave it?

This article will help you answer those questions and take the right course of action in these situations.

Did you say something weird or offensive?

If you did then there is your problem. Try and smooth it over by laughing it off (if it is weird) or saying sorry (if it is offensive) and ask if you can carry on talking to them.

How long has it been?

Give it time, maybe they are just thinking of a reply or are busy? You should give it at least one and a half weeks (about 10 days) before you think about trying to message the other user.

Has the person been online since?

If they have been active since your last reply then there is a good chance they are not away or otherwise busy. This would be a reason to message them and ask them if they wish to continue talking to you but only if it has been some time as described in the previous point.

In conclusion

If you didn’t say anything weird, and it has been some time, and the person has been online since it might be good to ask them what’s going on. If you still get no reply then best leave and let that person get on with whatever they are doing.